Whenever someone has died, my mother always tells me the same way. Before the words come out of her mouth, I already know what’s coming and my heart jumps as I wonder who it might be.
The news always comes late in the conversation – close to when we get off the phone. She leads in by saying, “Do you mind if I tell you some kind of sad news?” Her tone is always a little apologetic and hesitant.
Whenever I am hit with this combination of three, I know that someone is gone. This time around, it was my cousin’s daughter (which, according to the Internet, is my first cousin, once removed). On December 7, she went to a holiday party and fell off an eighth story balcony.
I was not close to her – in fact, we only met once when I was eight or nine years old and she was a baby. I remember she had blond hair liked the bubbles I blew with my chewing gum. I keep searching online for articles about what happened, but can find nothing.
I wonder who she had grown up to be and what her hopes and dreams were. I want to know more about the void she has left – as if by filling in the details of her presence in this world I can better understand her absence.
Her name was Holly and she was eighteen years old. I only met her once, but I am sad she is gone.
I’m sorry, that’s very tragic. I can always tell when my mom is going to give me similar news too. My heart seems to stop a beat and I hope it’s not someone too close, as horrible as it sounds.
Adverse possession? Are you still around?
My Mom would always not talk about someone passing I only would find out,if I was lucky if I would hear about when she would make a passing remark about the death to someone else.Usually this was done when we were little children,by the time I was in high school I learned about going to a funeral(or wake) when one of my classmates died.
Part of it was that she did not like going to funerals and that her Kids should not be exposed to this part of life.
She hated funerals so much that we did not have a wake for my Dad when he died,and we only had a service at the grave site.She said that is what she wanted done for her as well.
When she passed away in 2003,My Sisters and I did have a wake and full funeral for her.I feel that haveing a wake is part of the grieveing process for the liveing to get together and celebrate the life that is no more.